I’m sure I’m not the only one out there to feel this but why is it when we think of producing a body of writing in the form of a book we shit ourselves with a thousand doubts and don’t even begin?
I want to just put that out there and see how this unfolds in hope I can conquer some of my own fears just by writing about it. I have a thousand times thought of producing a body of work to completely freeze and shit myself and talk myself out of it convincing myself it will be a complete waste of time and really who the fuck is going to publish it, will anyone like it, do I really have the time, do I really want to make the time, and yes I can self publish sounds awesome but do I really have the time to market it and can I be fucked to?? These few main questions completely talk me out of beginning even though the feeling to begin is pretty big I’m going to convince myself yet again that I can’t.
But why? Writing is another form of expression too why can’t I? I’ve produced drawings and paintings and have exhibited many times before so why not this? The one thing I can share is each time I’ve hit a really big fear with manifesting a creative idea I have always found it will change my life and I do believe in many ways these immobilising fears that surface for each of us has something to do with aligning with one of the many things we are meant to do while we are here.
Really its the journey isn’t it? Removing fears and obstacles out of our way to walk a more authentic path so really beginning the many pages to come isn’t a waste of time because of all the gain and personal growth with the journey. Just confronting the huge fears of beginning and getting out of my own way is a release in itself. Hmmmm… I’m going to sit with that and probably shit myself some more BUT this time I’ll write out the fears see what moves see if I can convince myself to grow a set and actually begin. I will let you know.. 🙂